How Is 2015 Already Over??

2:23 PM

So. Yeah.

I don't think I'm ready for this.

How is it ALREADY New Year's eve again? I mean 2015 was a great year, but it's. just this. I'll be 20 in February. Oh my god. Just stop right now. I don't want to be 20.

But besides that, I've always liked the end/beginning of the year because it means fresh starts and new resolutions (even though I probably only did half of my 2015 resolutions). Fresh starts are always good and the whole feeling of a new, sparkling "chance" kind of gets me ready to go another year. :)

2015...wasn't the easiest year. I mean, who am I kidding. Being away at college has never gotten out of the difficult, stressful stage that it was in when I started even though it's less difficult and less stressful. It probably never will.

I think I've learned to accept that being me and being anxious about things literally almost no one else around me is stressed about is okay. There are other people like that and it's not a problem. I've also acknowledged that I probably was depressed last school year and I might go through on and off depression sometimes now.

I fell in love with Kpop even more. Music in general, actually. Music is probably one of my biggest loves and there have been so many times when it's gotten me through the day. I'm not trying to exaggerate, I'm not trying to get people to feel sorry for me. I'm just not very good at "socializing" and it takes a lot of energy and music helps. :D

Despite the hard things like struggling with being homesick, drawing class, and brainstorming for art when you've already brainstormed for three big projects (eungh)-- it was a good year.

>>> I visited my best friend and went paddle boarding with her for the first time! I learned that I am not good at standing on a floating thing on water. Balance is hard. I also learned that I'm great at the paddling part and my best friend sucks at it and HA.

>>> I went to a BTS concert. Yeah. That was a thing. That I still can't believe happened. 

He's weird. He's also my bias.
>>> I got to meet Sophia in Chicago. \(^_^)/ It was great. She was awesome. I loved hanging out with her and it's always cool to see how a person actually acts. And we share a lot of love of not taking videos of ourselves in front of people. I'd love to meet all my blogger friends someday :) <33

>>> Me and my family finally made a name for our little not-Christmas-not-New-Year's-but-somewhere-in-between thing that we've been doing for a few years now. It's Newmas (pronounced: Noo-mus). Brain child of yours truly. ;)

>>> I dove into the confusing world of Tumblr. (I'm on there every day now. Shhhh.)

>>> I also started doing Kpop youtube videos! I'm not exactly comfortable talking to a camera or as funny as I am with my sister but I think Imma keep doing it. And eventually add other topics of interest. 

There were quite a few bigger adventures this year (which were awesome and made me realize you'll never actually do anything big unless you decide to... just do it), but I think I want to go on more small adventures in 2016. 

I didn't read a ridiculous amount of books this month, but I'm still happy because I think I got back into a reading groove. :)

We'll Always Have Summer by Jenny Han ✪ (Finally finished this sucker. Disappointed with it tbh)
The Truth-Teller's Tale by Sharon Shinn ✪ (Better than I expected. Interesting idea!)
Famous in Love by Rebecca Serle ✪ (Eh. Not a fan of the love triangle)
The Goddess Test by Aimee Carter 3.5 (Good world-building, loved the plot, could've been less cliche)
United We Spy by Ally Carter ✪ (PRAISE. HALLELUJAH. Yes. This is exactly the finale I wanted)

*I thought I had more! Huh. Welp. 

All of these were five stars except for Nimona (four stars). I really loved all of them but if I had to pick the ones that just grabbed my soul and spoke to me, it'd be The Cure for Dreaming and The Coldest Girl in Coldtown. I really recommend reading them. They're gold. 

THE BIG MOMENT. Dun dun dun. 

Let's see how many of my resolutions I actually accomplished:
1. Take a picture every day for a year. (Nope. I tried. I really did. I just never remembered to take pictures every day.)
2. Try something (big or small) that I've never tried before. (Yes! I went paddle boarding.)
3. Finish a writing project. (Not even close.)
4. Exercise more. (Maybe? Does having to walk more for classes count? I'm just gonna count it hehe.)
5. Grow closer to God. (I think this could use a little more work tbh.)
6. Get straight A's. (YES. *triumphant roar*)
7. Learn how to do more types of art. (Yup. Thank you Drawing 2.)

Sooo... not bad.

I mean, with my forgetfulness, I'm impressed. But hopefully I can do better this next year. :D

What was your 2015 like? Was it great? Did it suck? Was it a mix? *hugs* to you, because you know what? No matter what, you still got one year down.


Let's Talk About: YA Romance (DON'T GET DISTRACTED)

9:53 PM

Right now I'm reading a book that has a very cliche romantic plot. Every cliche it could have, it probably does. And since one of the things that is obnoxiously present is a love triangle, it got me thinking. 

The love triangle in this book annoys me because the main character (Paige) first crushes on a guy, develops more feelings for him, and then finally starts "falling in love" but then as soon as love interest #2 comes along there's an attraction. 

So almost immediately, she likes both guys equally and she's having that same old conflict that every friggin YA romance has.

Oh no. I should like this guy. I do. I DO like this guy. But... this love interest #2 that I just met a week ago.... I feel such a pull towards him. He makes me a better person. I can't control how I act around him. 

I mean please. For lack of better phrasing, I think that's a load of bull. 

WHY. Why if you actually liked/possibly loved love interest #1 would you immediately start crushing on this other guy and not be able to control your reactions to him. That sounds like the lamest excuse ever invented. 

For once, I would love to read a YA romance where someone met someone else and fell in love and stayed fallen in love without being easily distracted by someone else. 

I would love to read a romance that wasn't over-sexualized or over-complicated. 

I mean, I understand that love might be complicated. But why not have it complicated for reasons other than other love interests intruding on your so-called love and strong relationship? Why not have it complicated because your parents don't like each other or because you don't agree about a big issue? 

And, maybe, if you have to be separated or you leave each other for a little bit because of a huge argument, don't find someone else. 

I dunno. That's just my opinion. :D Also, rant over. Sorry. I get intense. 

What do you think? TELL ME EVERYTHING.

all the things


7:58 PM

So November was really busy. A lot of studio classes have finals the week before official finals and it was getting down to the last weeks and uhmagosh. Stress to the max.

NOW IT IS OVER (since I'm writing this kinda mid-December. *avoids eye contact*). I'm so happy to be back home, not having to worry about responsibilities and grades. I'm sleeping in every day. I'm gonna keep this post shorter because it's so late, but I'm also going to start posting (and try to build up posts as well).

You should also keep an eye out for some guest posts by moi at some cool blogs around the blogosphere. Annnd, side note, I live in the eastern half of the States and it is gorgeous weather right now. Open-window-weather, which is my favorite of all time.

As always, there's a ton of music that fed my soul. In the most non-creepy way possible of course.

Mah boi Ravi wrote this and composed it and basically he's a genius. (Let me boast) Also, it's a really nice, upbeat song.

A really cool (darker) song. A little dramatic rapping is always good too ;)

Beats yo.

One of the most beautiful/sad songs I've heard in the Kpop world this year. I don't know why, but I just love it lots. Especially the rapping.

This is THE anthem. I listened to this so many times on the long walk to history class. It pumps me up so much. 

EXID is bae actually. This song is simultaneously kinda uncomfortable and kick-butt. See for yourself if it's your taste or not XD

The lyrics are so beautiful, so rich. I instantly fell in love with this song.

I love this song's feel and the singer's voice but just a warning... I wouldn't watch the music video if I were you. It has extremely interesting dancing (like not disgustingly sexual at all but just...really weird).

NOTE: As always, my songs list is of gigantic proportions.

(Wherein I add TV shows as a thing too)

Mix and Match - IKON
This all starts out as a story of how I hated/extremely disliked iKON because their rapper Bobby dissed Ravi on Show Me the Money (a rapping contest). Buuut, I watched this (their pre-debut survival show) and I couldn't help it. I'm a fan now. Although a still slightly begrudging one.

I actually read a couple books this month. #pride

Dumplin' by Julie Murphy.  I'd been looking forward to reading this for ages...and I liked it. But that's about it. It didn't scream amazing at me. It didn't make me fall in love with everything about it. I wanted it to SO much because it tackles such great things, but it didn't happen for me. I liked the characters pretty good, but the romance was a little off for me and...I can't quite put my finger on it. 

The Cure for Dreaming by Cat Winters. ✪ THIS IS MY NEW FAVORITE BOOK OF ALL TIME. Hypnotism + women's rights + magic. Um, yes please. The author created this alternate reality so flawlessly and beautifully. I was left in awe. The character was me basically and I've always been passionate about women's rights. I just love this book so much. 

>>> I got a design internship! Can I get a what what?

>>> Also found out that me and my roommate will be able to get a two bedroom apartment next semester. So. friggin. excited. I'll be able to take my piano up there now!

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