Hey, I Like You (Or Wait...Do I?)
Today is a day for a short, sweet post.
I debated posting this for next week's Sunday Swoons post for Briana's feature on Reader, Writer, Critic, but I decided I would do it today since it's closer to Sunday (I'm such a genius).
This week's theme is: Romance Pet Peeves (That Happen All the Time in Cookie Cutter YA)
Briana basically covered all the bases ('case she's awesome like that) so I decided to sort of wander onto a different topic that's been on my mind recently. And which I hope you'll discuss and agree and disagree with in the comments. ;)
So...hm, how do I lead into this?
Every relationship ever written in fiction (but I'm going to focus on YA) begins with the common symptoms: tingling, nervousness, jumpiness, jitteryness. All around acting like you stole from the cookie jar. Multiple times.
There's that boy/girl. A connection. Something that feels like an electric shock, which personally doesn't sound to comfortable or like something to look forward too but oh well. Heated stares. Random shoulder-brushing or some such thing.
Thing is, I'm a introvert. A shy one. I act this way whenever I come in contact with any humans. Well, except for the heated stares and erm *cough* What I mean to say is that I am nervous and jittery when I have to take part in a thing called "social interaction". I don't think this behavior is something I can accurately gauge guy-liking for myself or any other shy introverts or people uncomfortable around guys because they haven't been around them a lot or whatever.
Maybe then...maybe a shy introvert would be looking for someone who makes them feel comfortable right off, who makes them feel like themself.
Forget the nervousness and awkward stuttering. We shy introverts deal with this every time we step out of the house to replenish our chocolate supplies. It's SO tiring. It just makes me want to flop in bed and sleep and watch movies the whole day.
Wouldn't it be nice if we met someone (a guy theoretically) for the first time and just immediately felt at ease? Comfortable enough to make jokes? Grinning not because we're supposed to (because what he said is apparently supposed to be funny in our society) but because we want to.
I've been thinking about this because I'm an eighteen year old girl and according to my sources this is the time for relationships.
Ah, no.
Buut, it did get me thinking about what kind of relationship (or maybe I should say--all things leading to the relationship) would be the most fulfilling. The most natural.
What do you think? Do you agree with me? Do you disagree (it's fine if you do... ....)? Do you have any other observations to add that are in this line of thought?
I debated posting this for next week's Sunday Swoons post for Briana's feature on Reader, Writer, Critic, but I decided I would do it today since it's closer to Sunday (I'm such a genius).
This week's theme is: Romance Pet Peeves (That Happen All the Time in Cookie Cutter YA)
Briana basically covered all the bases ('case she's awesome like that) so I decided to sort of wander onto a different topic that's been on my mind recently. And which I hope you'll discuss and agree and disagree with in the comments. ;)
So...hm, how do I lead into this?
Every relationship ever written in fiction (but I'm going to focus on YA) begins with the common symptoms: tingling, nervousness, jumpiness, jitteryness. All around acting like you stole from the cookie jar. Multiple times.
There's that boy/girl. A connection. Something that feels like an electric shock, which personally doesn't sound to comfortable or like something to look forward too but oh well. Heated stares. Random shoulder-brushing or some such thing.
Thing is, I'm a introvert. A shy one. I act this way whenever I come in contact with any humans. Well, except for the heated stares and erm *cough* What I mean to say is that I am nervous and jittery when I have to take part in a thing called "social interaction". I don't think this behavior is something I can accurately gauge guy-liking for myself or any other shy introverts or people uncomfortable around guys because they haven't been around them a lot or whatever.
Maybe then...maybe a shy introvert would be looking for someone who makes them feel comfortable right off, who makes them feel like themself.
Forget the nervousness and awkward stuttering. We shy introverts deal with this every time we step out of the house to replenish our chocolate supplies. It's SO tiring. It just makes me want to flop in bed and sleep and watch movies the whole day.
Wouldn't it be nice if we met someone (a guy theoretically) for the first time and just immediately felt at ease? Comfortable enough to make jokes? Grinning not because we're supposed to (because what he said is apparently supposed to be funny in our society) but because we want to.
I've been thinking about this because I'm an eighteen year old girl and according to my sources this is the time for relationships.
Ah, no.
Buut, it did get me thinking about what kind of relationship (or maybe I should say--all things leading to the relationship) would be the most fulfilling. The most natural.
What do you think? Do you agree with me? Do you disagree (it's fine if you do... ....)? Do you have any other observations to add that are in this line of thought?
I'm so glad you joined me again! Oh and thank you for all the complements/flattery! ;) You're pretty awesome too! I do agree with you, but I can see why authors write romances like that for their characters. I mean it's exciting. It's what every little girl has supposedly dreamed of and it makes something abstract tangible and it speaks to the fact that as humans we try to prove things and tend to like and believe more in the concrete than in other emotions and abstract feelings. However, I don't believe it's like that in life at all. I mean I can see being nervous and who doesn't get all funky after a heated stare, (they are intense!) but I don't think that a feeling as concrete or fantastical as most writers create happens in real life.
ReplyDeleteI don't really date, for a sundry of reasons but let's not get into that. Anyways, I do have to put in that one of the best relationships and friendships I've ever had and probably will ever had, was one where we were totally comfortable with each other. I found it easier to be around him and by myself around him than with anyone I've ever met, almost right off the bat. I mean yeah I'm comfortable with friends, but I had to get to know them and work to get to the point where I was/am that comfortable with them.
Anyways, I loved your post and I like where you took this weeks topic! Very original and interesting! It's totally fine that you didn't post on Sunday, the point is the post, not the timing. I got it up really late last night, sorry! Since you and I are currently the only people participating (that I know of), I was thinking of asking if you want to kind of co-host with me, and you can help come up with topics and such. If you want I am open to having you. ;) You're a blast!
Yay me too! Dang, I was trying to be all subtle about it ;) You deserve all the compliments :) (By the way, I love your new blog design!) Unless it isn't new. I'm pretty sure it is. Oh my gosh, I feel so bad right now. It is new right??! Yeah, I agree with you on authors putting it there because of little girl dreams and because tangible is way more...convincing and dynamic. Buut I kinda hate that it makes expectations unrealistic. Still devour the scenes between my OTPs though. ;)
DeleteHey, I don't date either so we're all good here *grins* That's great that you were able to be in a relationship/friendship like that! And gosh, YES. I completely understand having to work at friendships unlike other people who seem to fall into them effortlessly. *le sigh*
Thank you so much! I didn't think it had been covered (or at least not where I'd read) so I was really happy. :)) No problem, Briana! I understand being busy. ;D Knowing me, posting late is probably something that will happen a lot. Cause, um, I forget and other...stuff..
I'd love to co-host! Thanks for asking me *happy dance* Aw, you're awesome too ;) I'll shoot an email over soon.
Oh it was totally subtle! You're a flattery/complement ninja! ;) Aww thanks! :D *blushes dramatically* Yay! Oh my goodness I have been going back and forth so much about finding the right background for it and fixing issues! I'm glad you like it too! Yes you are right it is new, but you wouldn't need to worry or feel bad even if it was old, haha.
DeleteHaha, YES. VICTORY. *fist pump*
DeleteI know...but I still kinda would feel bad. >.> I completely approve of this new design though ;)
I am an introvert, but not a super shy one.
ReplyDeleteI do, however, still need to make an effort to participate in human interaction.
(I am also an 18 year old girl who has not yet been in a romantic relationship.)
The ideal guy would be someone with whom I AM comfortable, someone who I KNOW isn't judging me on my likes/dislikes, someone who makes me smile just cuz. Actually, we'd ideally be friends before getting into a relationship, because that way we'd be able to explore more of each other without the awkwardness of dating.
Once we do start dating, though, I wouldn't be surprised if a little butterflies and blushing does happen. I feel like that's just natural for romance (though I wouldn't know, would I? Haha. Perhaps my perceptions are twisted because of the books I read).
Note: my mother is a non-shy introvert, like I am, though she was super shy as a kid. She was friends with my father before dating him, and then they just fell naturally and easily into a relationship. There were butterflies etc, but she knew that they were something more because they had had the non-butterfly time of normal friendship before to compare it to.
(My parents' relationship is something I hope to model my future relationship off of...)
There's my two cents. :-)
I've always wanted to be a non-shy introvert. You are my hero. ;) *gasps in horror* Human interaction. Eugh.
Delete(Yay for eighteen-year-old-girls-who-haven't-been-in-romantic-relationships-because-they're-independent-women!)
Yeah, for sure, the butterflies and tingliness would come in there Which I totally believe in. :D I was just imagining the potential heart attack I would have if I actually had to go through guy-I-like nervousness PLUS general-people-nervousness. XD You know, you expressed your ideal relationship beautifully. :)
That's such an awesome & sweet story about your parents! I don't blame you at all for wanting that *grins*
Your two cents were awesome. ;)
Why thank you! I'm proud to be someone's hero. :-)
DeleteLet me tell you - we're born with introversion. We're not born with shyness. It takes some work, but you can gradually learn how to be more comfortable with people. Basically what you work on is cutting down preparation time before human interaction - I still need 10-15 minutes to get prepared - don't expect me to say something funny on the spot.
But it is possible. I am living proof :-)
Actually, my mother is the proof. She can be the life of a party. My friends don't believe me when I say that she is an introvert. :-)
Oh yeah...I definitely need prep time too. I'm much calmer (and less awkward) if I have gone over everything and made myself chill. :D Isn't that the worst? When you're so hilarious with close friends or whatever but then you go out in public and you're like, "Hehe." No awesome jokes. >.<
DeleteThanks for the encouragement! I've actually gotten way less shy than I was when I was younger. Gosh, I was painfully shy. Buut with work, it's gotten a little easier.
That's awesome. :) I think my dad's that kind of introvert too. He SAYS that when he was younger he was kinda stand-offish with people and not too friendly but..I don't know. From what I've heard, he was a daredevil and not scared of anything ;)